Don't argue

Send me to bed without supper,

I am long gone from hunger.

I am without a tongue, without a taste, and without a truth.

Everything about me is made up,

just ask that group of people,

they'll tell you all about

who I was in highschool

What I believe in,

and whether it's cool or not.

They'll run circles around me,

no matter where I go.

So maybe it's best, you just stare from a distance,

because the rest of me,

that's all made up.

Shake my hand

Allow me to introduce myself.

I am the one howling at the moon.

NOT Edwards moon, you jackass.

My moon.

I don't howl because I'm lonely,

I could care less about that.

I howl because I need to be heard,

I have things to say,

and too often

you alphas are blinded by my silky coat.

I'd like to stay hidden

because I hate to be seen.

I give in sometimes, yes.

I walk with sex in my step, yes.

But allow me to introduce myself-

It's all for me.

Allow me to be the first person to be real with you

"Suck my dick, make like a banana and shit."

You don't like that baby?

Try this-

I'm the illest perfection you'll ever meet.

You will love me, I promise.

But I promise you,

I'll never love you back.

I know just what to say.

I act accordingly.

I'm untouchable,

which is why you'll want me.

which is while you'll love me.

which is why you won't have me.

So allow me to excuse myself.

you can shake my other hand

and kiss my ass.

You, tah-tah!

I have leaned against the railing of my deck.

half way falling over the side,

I keep waiting for you to comment on my positioning-

Only, I am greeted with the oh-so familiar, "as of late" silence.

I'm not okay with not being okay.

At least when you were here, someone was grieving stupidity like me.

stupidity, such as me.

And on nights when you saw me

carelessly becoming young again,

rebirthing innocence in the form of

makeup, curlers and 300 wardrobe changes.

When you watched me get stood up

for the fiftieth time,

I should have known.

he was stupid then.

While you walked street to street,

at 12 pm.

arriving at home

to play with me in the snow,

(to wake me up, to play in the snow.)

we shivered and talked about

who was stupid then.

And now

you might as well be 3049 billion miles away.

I know there wasn't much I could do,

you leaving was so exciting.

one of us was getting out.

at least one of us would get out.

and maybe I'm starting to realize

I was stupid.

Send

I love insomnia fakers.

They stay up until 1 am,

drinking coffee, and reading comics.

Agitated by the caffeine that melts away any chance of sleep.

If only they knew

how it felt

to fade into day and night

the only difference between being

the light shining through the curtain.

I wonder if they understand the concept of counting sheep

I wonder if they've ever counted

3,000,000,000 sheep.

and then watched the sunrise.

If only they understood

insomnia never sleeps.

and while they are counting,

I'm herding sheep.

Ship wrecked

If my insides could match my outsides

I would look a lot like an oil spill.

clouded with dark patches,

glimmering red in the sun.

I wish I could be serious with myself.

But I am an immediate joke.

I set myself up every time.

it's so easy to kill yourself.

when you hardly know yourself.

it's a lot like committing murder

with zero chance of consequence.

there is a blossoming,

and a wilting.

But me?

I have discovered the beauty of sleep.

Here goes me

There is a carnivorous blossom

within the lions view of my rib cage.

It dwells inside.

I find myself feeding it,

just to die.

Harvest

There was a point

when harvesting your moonlight

was my midnight goal.

I can see your face,

3 minutes from my own

and the only harvesting I want to do

is myself.

and leave.