Dear readers,

I've never taken a second to explain any of this blog to anyone. I know there are 6 of you following me, and while 6 seems like a small number, I know there are at least 20 more than read this religiously. I want to take this time now to thank all of you for reading any of this. What you've been reading is an insight to the person I truly am. Too often have I been characterized by my bubbly sense of humor, which is usually confused for stupidity. I come here to release and reach for the ugliest parts of me, to have six seconds of honesty, sometimes even hours of honesty. It's like a mirror that isolates every flaw, you get to pin point parts about yourself that you never would have noticed any other time.

Let me take a second here to say-

I am not stupid.

I take great pride in being an intelligent woman, and although I fuck up every once in a while...

I fuck up correctly.

And isn't that a wonderful thing to know about me? Don't you love knowing that you're not wasting your time reading stupid rants about terrible moments, connected between run-ons and rude sass.

This post will NOT be about me floating my own boat or any of that shit. This is simply me taking the time to explain myself, and what you've been reading the past year of your life.

I will be the first person to say, I am not a perfect writer, but I am absolutely above average when it comes to describing ugly things.

I am a fan of making ugly moments seem sexy,

seem-

beautiful, heart-wrenching, illuminating, relatable.

because I am literally, everyone.

I am your dead beat father,

I am the boy that broke your heart,

I am the girl that stole your favorite sweater.

I am absolutely every war you've ever fought, whether it be global or internal.

Only difference is, I am honest about it.

I am honest about why I broke your heart,

Why I don't pay the bills,

why I pick fights for no reason.

This is why you read this.

I'd be lying if I said I was at all normal, but that's the beauty of it all.

Am I right?

The last few years of my life has been jam packed full of disgusting moments, moments when the people I loved the most took everything from me, and left me feeling... well, Like shit.

But the point of all this, this blog, is to remind myself that no matter how mean spirited, hateful, spiteful, beautiful, rude, sexual, or happy my poetry can be, in the end it always turns out to be a positive thing to look back on.

I can sit down and say "Look how far I've come."

I have cried, laughed and grinded allllll uppp on this laptop several times just to get to where I am.

(yes, grinded all up on...)

The point is,

what you are reading, is 100% real,

it's honest as I'll ever be.

and I guess what I'm trying to say is, the fact that even a handful of people still like me after reading any of these poems has really been a beautiful thing.

I create faith every time you understand what I mean,

and you create faith every time you understand what I say.

Not a faith in anything religious,

but a faith in mankind, and the closed roads we've paved when it comes to expression via words.

Keep reading,

It keeps me sane.

-Olivia